Why getting together with friends matters

Friends sit near the top of what matters

When the Pew Research Center surveyed 5,057 US adults in July 2023, 61% said having close friends is extremely or very important for living a fulfilling life. That was far more than said the same about marriage, children or having a lot of money.

Many people also have a real circle to draw on. In the same survey, 38% said they have five or more close friends.

Shared meals bring people closer

Eating together seems to do something special. In a 2017 study published in Adaptive Human Behavior and Physiology, Oxford psychologist Robin Dunbar analysed a UK national survey and found that people who eat socially more often feel happier and are more satisfied with life.

The study also looked at what made an evening meal feel close. People who felt closer to their dining companions described meals with more people at the table, more laughter and more reminiscing. Dunbar's analysis suggests the link runs from eating together to feeling bonded, not just the other way round.

A wider circle, a happier one

Pew's survey points the same way. Among people with five or more close friends, 81% said they were completely or very satisfied with their friendships. Among those with one to four close friends, the figure was 65%.

Most people would get together more if it were easier

Wanting to meet isn't the problem. In an OpenTable survey of 1,524 Americans who had dined with a group of 10 or more in the past five years, 68% said they would organize more events if the process were easier.

That's the opportunity: make the planning part lighter, and the getting together follows.

Make it a habit your group keeps

A few things help a group meet more often:

• Pick a rhythm. A standing monthly dinner or a brunch every few weeks is easier to keep than "we should do this again sometime".
• Share the hosting. Rotate who starts the plan, so it never rests on one person.
• Let everyone weigh in. People show up more happily to a place they had a say in.
• Keep it fair. Budgets, diets and travel time differ. A plan that works for the whole table beats the loudest person's favourite.

How MiBA helps

MiBA turns the planning into something you do together. One person starts a gathering and shares one link. Everyone answers a few questions on their own: when they're free, what they feel like eating, the vibe, the budget and what they don't eat. You only see what the group would love after you've answered, so everyone says what they really want.

MiBA weighs every answer against real restaurants and ranks them, the host puts up to five on a short list, and the group votes. Then you get a link to book, and everyone hears where and when. If someone can't make it, they say so with one tap.

Getting together is hard. Being together is great.